Coping with Grief
When I was 24 years old…my father passed away. He was only 48 at the time, but was battling an illness for a few years. As a newlywed, just a year into my marriage, I felt completely lost and unable to cope with the grief! The day before he passed, he looked so angelic and peaceful at the hospital. I remember thinking to myself… maybe he will actually pull through…but he didn’t. The next few months were filled with disbelief which eventually turned into anger. How could someone who was such a good person have his life snatched, while others who choose the wrong path got to live long lives.
In hindsight this tragedy, which initially made me loose my faith in God, led me on my spiritual journey that not only filled me with love, joy and purpose but restored my faith at a higher level than I could have ever imagined!
Whether you’ve lost a loved one suddenly or had some time to prepare, death leaves most of us feeling overwhelmed. While it’s essential to take as much time as needed to mourn, here are some steps to help you cope with grief & find your inner peace & joy again.
Spend Time with Loved Ones
Coping with the death of a loved one can often lead to isolation, as you try to process the grief. Yet spending time with loved ones, is a great way to receive support and feel comforted during these difficult times.
Hearing stories of how others coped with grief or even feeling the warmth of a hug can help lift your mood and spirits. Surrounding yourself with those who love you, can help you release your thoughts and feelings and begin the healing process. It’s normal to feel sad, or guilty for going out, but allow yourself to feel moments of joy and happiness.
Get Enough Sleep
It is common to experience a change in sleep patterns when coping with grief. For some…falling asleep becomes a problem, while for others sleep becomes the perfect escape. Our bodies and mind recharge during sleep, which is crucial for us to function. Thus, a full night’s sleep is not only essential, but it also aids in the healing process. Often our loved visit us in our dreams, which allows us to feel joyful and connected again. If you struggle with falling asleep, here are some Tips on how to get a good night’s sleep.
Eat Healthy
We all know that our bodies need food in order to function, but often food is used as comfort when we feel sad and down. Many people turn to junk food, sweets or drinking to lift up their mood. Although this might make you feel happy temporarily, it can actually affect your mood afterwards and make coping more difficult. Choosing fresh, healthy food will not only help your body cope, but it will give you more energy throughout the day.
Exercise
Most us would rather crawl into bed and pull the covers when it comes to dealing or coping with grief. We hope these feelings will go away if we hide out from the world. But in actuality, movement and exercise has been proven to be one of the best remedies to cope with sadness and grief. When we exercise, our brain releases endorphins, which cause us to feel joy and can help improve our mood. It also helps in managing stress and anxiety. Committing to at least 30 min each day will not only help you feel better, but you will also sleep better at night.
Spend Time Outdoor
The Sun is a powerful source of energy and has a remarkable healing power. Not only does it provide our bodies with natural Vitamin D, but it also has been scientifically proven to help lift up our Mood. Spending time outdoors, has been shown to improve mental health, reduce stress, and boost energy levels. So go out for a walk, ride a bike or just relax outside and see how your mood shifts.
Allow Light Into Your Home
A lack of sunlight can affect our mood and make us feel sluggish. Simple things like opening up the curtains and letting in natural light, can shift your mood quickly. If you live in an area without a lot of natural sunlight, consider adding new LED light fixtures and bulbs.
Another way to boost your mood is to change your home environment. Reorganize your space to make it feel more comfortable and pleasant. Add a few plants, and take steps to declutter. Piles of paperwork or clothing may induce stress, so take some time to organize your belongings.
Release through Journaling
Starting a journal can be a great way to process your thoughts and feelings. The simple act of writing can provide tremendous release of anger, sadness and grief. It can also help you track your progress in healing. If expressing yourself verbally is difficult, keeping a journal of your feelings might be a great outlet for you.
Practice Self-Care
Self-care is essential for our well-being. When you’re grieving, it’s easy to forget about yourself. Some people throw themselves into work, while others may try to stay busy by making sure everyone else is OK. However, over time, this can lead to feeling burnout. Make time for yourself each day to do something that you enjoy. This can be as simple as reading, having a relaxing bath, taking a walk, or spending time with friends.
Connect Spiritually
Everyone deals with grief in their own way. In addition, how we were brought up plays a huge role in our thoughts and beliefs about the world we live in. Some think that once our life here ends, we will never see or connect with our loved ones again.
In the first years since my father passed away, I was eager to find out if there was life after death. I researched all I could find on N.D.E (Near Death Experiences). I was shocked to discover that most, if not all, recounted similar experiences, regardless of religion, race, gender or age.
The stronger my faith grew, the more signs I was seeing that my father was trying to communicate with us. There was even one occasion that he warned us in a dream about my brother’s upcoming ski-trip and potential harm which he avoided.
Today, 27 years later, I wholeheartedly believe that once we pass, our soul moves into another dimension. And while we may not see those who have passed on, we can still feel their presence when we become still. Practicing meditation can help us feel calm and enter that peaceful state of mind.
This was so beautiful and helpful. Loss of my father and having to find ways to help heal my mother is a tough toll I am passing these ideas to her in Her grief period. Thank you for these words and wisdom to healing. And thank you for sharing your story